The Hot Oil Disaster of 2014

 

  Ah, so I make it a point to oil the change on "Black Tiger" my 2009 Honda CBR600RR/A ("black tiger" has a better ring to it than letter/number designations).  I go out and get the necessary 3 quarts of Mobil 1 MX4T motorcycle oil 10W-40 (per manual, though interestingly, regular Mobil 1 would work just fine [by manual] but AutoZone was charging almost the same price at $8.99 per quart!  What the heck?) 

$8.99 per quart, baby!  Yeah!

  I remove the chain guard and carefully back up the bike and apply liberal amounts easily and in good fashion and notice there's a little tiny bit too much slack on the chain itself that will requiring some tightening which I'll check in the manual tomorrow, then I get to removing the lower faring.  Ah.  This is no easy task as there's two hidden tricky clips that caused me concern.  I didn't want to smash and destroy the lower faring after all or rip-out and crack anything.  Removed the middle and upper faring and still it wouldn't give.  Turns out after some wrestling an hour later into it I got the lower faring off.  Interested how it'll all get back together, about 20 bolts all on the garage floor now, though in good placement for putting back together nicely.

  Removed the now easy-to-see drain bolt and torqued-off the oil filter.  Noticed it was an actual Honda brand filter so the kid had it serviced at a Honda dealership I'm guessing.  Took a bit of a tug but it came loose and drained the oil carefully avoiding the exhaust pipes evilly placed right underneath using a WalMart bag.  Nice and clean and nary a drop spilt anywhere.

Hay-ay!  Uhnnn!  I dare not spill a solitary drop lest I get punished!  (for the ladies).

  Waited a few minutes and replaced the bolt and new filter which I smoothed over with old oil for a good seal and torqued correctly to-spec both and filled her up with the nice MX4T Mobil 1, all $30 worth and gave it a start.  Seemed to run nicely!  Good!  Took me a whole hour mostly because of the stupid faring which it turns out I can avoid removing from now on I think as I can probably get-around and maneuver all of it anyway, though good-to-know how to remove the plastics if-necessary.

  Decided to put a little SeaFoam injector-cleaner in the gas tank and let it run as an afterthought for a few minutes after I stopped the engine.  Let it run a few more minutes to check for leaks and..

  WOOOSH!  It sounded like my bike was under water.  Indeed, oil was spraying everywhere from the filter.  Crazy madness.

  Of course, smoke burning off the clean exhaust manifold pipes as well.  A bloody mess.  I manically run to turn-off the spitting engine as I watched it puddle hot oil all over the garage floor, trying not to slip.  Ugh.  WHY?!

 

 

 

   Becky was amused and took a snapshot of the doom and then got me some sawdust and paper towels.  I've never epic-failed on a motorcycle oil-change before.  What gives?!  Confused, I consulted Lord Google.  Becky continued to assist, still a bit amused that something so simple I've done several dozen times over the last 30 years alluded me utterly. 


Smoke from burning oil blurred this photo.  Doomed bolts in forefront to be submerged soon as I scramble for paper towels.

  After a lengthy cleanup (she wisely gave me a pad to back the bike's front tire over so as to not get the tire oiled for later danger, Becky's quite good at crisis management) I checked the manual.  Everything was to spec.  I don't get it.  I went online and checked the oil filter number:  PH6017A.  I went into the trashcan to find the old filter: PH6017A.  I went to look at the new filter box which I had just bought and installed from the trashcan as well: PH6607A.  Ah.  Details.  Attention to details.  Ugh.

  Well, the oil cannot be re-used as it mostly spilled into the original oil pan and overflowed everywhere spraying everything.  I wiped the area down (luckily avoiding cars as I had allowed "Black Tiger" her own space for this operation.

Black Tiger no like wrong oil filter.  Now I poo-poo diarrhea all over your garage you bad boy.  Pffft.

  On a good note, if I had been riding, I likely would have gotten hurt or died.  Hot, spraying oil all over that rear tire would have made me wreck quickly and the bike would have seized, destroying it and costing me a lot and I'd crash hard.


                        
 
 So I'm off to WalMart to buy some more oil, a correct filter, and another oil pan.  I think I'll work on it tomorrow.  Becky, amused that I normally ace this operation, just shook her head.. and handed me a paper towel roll.

Looks like you f*cked-up your motorcycle a bit.  Covered in oil?  Here, have a flower, silly boy.

Tobacco Illegal

 

Pothead

    So the wondrous city of Boulder in its "lefter than Pelosi" stance has decreed tobacco is illegal to be smoked within its city borders.  You cannot smoke tobacco in a closed vehicle or in any building whatsoever, nor can you smoke tobacco outside anywhere in the city.  Marijuana, however, is okay.

  Marijuana has been heralded the "miracle wonder drug" that cures all ails.  I've seen it on CNN and MSNBC!  Wondrous miracles saving children!  It fixes everything and you cannot get any ailment from it!  Tobacco will induce lung cancer from smoking it but since marijuana is "all natural" you are cancer-free!  Not only does it save the economy but it also cures global warming as the heat produced from the embers doesn't even register on any infrared device.  Tobacco, on the other hand is the true enemy.  Many forest fires have been started from cigarettes and cigars, not to mention pipe tobacco!  Tobacco has caused more deaths from heart disease and emphysema over the years!  Should we rename it from "The Devil's Weed" to "The Angle's Cure?"  Yes.  Will people be too high to notice America crumbling thanks to the "Bread and Circuses" Campaign?  Maybe. 

bread and circuses:

1.   a diet of entertainment or political policies on which the masses are fed to keep them happy and docile.

2.   Obama campaign strategy.

  Recent arrests across Boulder county involve children trying to remove marijuana from government-supplied joints and putting naturally grown tobacco leaf into them.  Once caught, they're expected a 5 year sentence and a $5000 fine, during which they will be lovingly "reprogrammed" to understand that even though marijuana "dulls the senses" it "enhances health". 
 

Jamaican scientists

   Success stories abound for habitual marijuana users across the world throughout history, more so than not.  True scientists were all "pot-heads" because they knew how helpful weed can be when solving mathematical concerns or delicate scientific research.  One Jamaican scientist explains, "Ya mon." before slumping over.  He's almost perfected a spoon.

Jamaican scientist "tim" and his lovely assistant, "Marcy Jingle Walrus-butt" nearly discovering "spooning"

 
  So make sure all your children get a "leg up" and "light up" today so they can do well in school!  Kids always smoking pot when I can remember back in 1987 always did well after high school.  I'm so jealous of their professions such as "assistant gas station clerk" and "WalMart stocker", "waitress/actress", "newspaper journalist", and "bitch".

  Remember to light up, kits!  Your future is in your hands now!  Enjoy the smoke!  Yeah!


 

Thing Ring Revelations

  So I received the PedalTrain Grande the other week and got some time to install all my pedals, of which I promptly blew an inline internal fuse thanks to Behringer's Harmonizer.  I need to find a more "robust" plug.  In the meantime I'm using a Chinese plug that has a bit of inline noise though mostly imperceptible.

  The Blackbird preamp pedal is quite nice and boosts richly when needed with 3 12AX7 vacuum tubes for extra creaminess.

  A final, noise-reduction pedal near the end is needed.  I think the Decimator II will do nicely in a few months, but it's somewhat pricey. 

Behold, The Thing Ring!

  Please take note of the "Freeze" pedal in the top left.  Connections go from bottom right to left as follows:

Boss Octaver OC-2 (Japanese vintage)
Behringer Harmonizer US600
Mooer Acoustikar
Ibanez Turbo Tube Screamer
Boss Super Feedbacker & Distortion (vintage)
MXR Fullbore Metal Distortion
ProCo Rat Distortion (Rat2 1988)
Rocktek Distortion (cheap and gritty)
MXR '78 Badass Distortion
Boss Metal Core ML-2
Rocktron Silver Dragon Distortion

(next row up, right to left)

Effectrode Audiophile Blackbird SR71 Preamp and Distortion
Boss EH-2 Enhancer (used for loss in the signal chain to this point)
Boss Dimension C DC-2
Boss Digital Dimension (aka Dimension D) DC-3
Boss Chorus CE-2 (Japanese vintage)
Boss Phaser PH-1R (Japanese vintage)
Toadworks Barracuda Flanger (Heart's Howard Leese signature edition)
Mooer Shimverb Reverb
Electro-Harmonix Freeze
Artec Analog Delay

  

This all goes up into my rack system, through the Digitech 2112 where I usually add:
Compression
5-cent stereo Detune
light bit of 12ax7 Preamp boost
light bit of Noise Reduction
Though I also can add other effects, they are not "boutique".  I have on "The Thing Ring" setting immediate access of:
Stereo Chorus
Digital Stereo Delay
Solo Boost 5 db
Digital Wah-Wah
Time Warp (plays backwards what I play)
(I can access others...)



This then goes into a:

TC 1210 Electronics Spatial Expander Chorus/Flanger (vintage):

Roland SRV-330 Dimensional Space Reverb:

BBE Sonic Maximizer 882i (used for loss in the signal chain):

Behringer Ultragain Pro Preamp 12AX7 Tube (for analog boost and warming the digital signal):

Finally, into the computer interface:
PreSonus 22VSL:

Recording with:
PreSonus Studio One