Thursday, June 28, 2012

Hot Hot Hot


Firestar of Marvel Comics
  It's so hot outside this whole week I had to turn the open oven on to cool down the house!  A little rain is coming over the mountains it seems, nice to rain ash-dirt on us. 



   At this point, I'm expecting antics from Super Mario Brothers The Motion Picture to start.



  Picked-up Becky's carb-cleaned Ninja 250 Special Edition at Rocky Mountain Cycle Plaza.  They had scratched the tank a bit but buffed it out pretty well.  Becky was none too pleased.  They offered to have it repainted and clear-coated (the scratch is about an inch or so) but they did a very decent rebuffing so it might be all-good.  Bike had to be driven under 50 mph (no more than 5k rpm) as it only had 12 miles on it (sat in the garage for 2 years).  I doubled the miles riding it home on the side streets.  Gave it some good acceleration pulls from stop to seat the rings.  Break-in process is vital for new vehicles, but most people don't do that, or bed the brakes either.  Proper break-in procedure usually results in better-than-posted mpg and slightly better horsepower after a year or so. 



I knew this guy who had a Ninja ZX-9 (no longer produced) who brought back his bike and revved it to redline the day he got it (clutch engaged) to show off the engine "sound".  He'd do this and a few burnouts in the driveway.  After a few months and 2000 miles I asked him if he had changed his oil yet from the "break-in" procedure, as he was complaining his engine sounded like marbles in a coffee can.  1000 miles later he did and out came chunks of aluminum.  His engine was shot.  Kawasaki gave him a new engine after 3 months as it was under warranty.



  Proper break-in of a car or bike is keep rpms under 4 or 5k and not a steady pace (so, city driving is good).  At about 500 to 1000 miles, change the oil and you're done.  Easy, yet so few adhere to this rule.  Ah, well.  I figure the way a guy treats his cars is how he'll treat his lady at home (though not always if he's simply obsessive-compulsive) and is a good judge of character overall.  Wax his car twice a year, clean inside and out?  Fine.  Wax every weekend?  This guy's got issues.  Never hand-wax?  This guy doesn't like his life as he's still searching for something better than what he's got.  Got a Prius?  He's a moron and voted Obama, then will vote Obama again to not admit he was wrong the first time.

Toyota Prius entering the Full-On Gay Rainbow Tunnel in California

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Balrog Destroys Colroado


Gandalf using a Boss Chorus CE-2 Lawful Good pedal to stop an Octaver-summoned Balrog

  It seems Colorado is engulfed in flames.  My website still holds a 24x7 news-feed of the devastation.  I went to my guitar class today despite it and Master Bard Rick Greene taught me the rest of Rush's The Anarchist and explained he doesn't use pedals much, just what combo amps offer, and we both chastised each other jokingly for opposite choices on that, as I can't get enough effects.  During the class, it rained ash down onto my car somehow, about a full inch or so.  I had brought over my red MXR '78 Badass and we played with that for a while.  Hm.. 

In 1978, this movie was awesome in the theaters when I saw it.

  Sadly, I'm afraid my untrustworthy Boss Octaver OC-2 from 1983 (or so) may have caused Colorado to incinerate, as it has a 2 octave sub-boost that opens doors to the Dwarven mines of Khazad-dûm and have unleashed a balrog which ignited a good portion of the Rocky Mountains.  I'll work on that, I promise.
  I hope that since we're in a bit of a drought, firefighters are adhering to water conservation laws that the hippies strongly enforce, as generally rich hippie homes are burning down first.  The $2M homes are a'blazin' but these are the same folks that call the police when you try to water your lawn on "non-water" days.  Since today's a "non-water" day, I encourage all firefighters to stop trying to put out the fires near these people's homes.  If they don't stop, I'll call the police.



Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Colorado Springs Fire Update

My website, http://www.mikecronis.com/, has a live stream of the fire as we speak!!!  Go there to watch the devastation!!  It's obviously a fiendish plot by the Russians to defeat Space Command and their arch nemesis, Mike Cronis!  Click the link above.

Sorry, there's an embedded ad I couldn't delete.  Ugh.

Colorado is Burning




   
  Colorado is on fire, particularly Colorado Springs.  The USAF Academy is evacuated and several homes are on fire there.  Garden of the Gods is also ablaze, and visibility is zero at Woodman and Academy Blvd.  It's pretty nuts.  Here in my hamlet of Fountain it's fine, though it rains ash (good for my vinyard, actually).  I water my lawn daily now.  Temps are over 100 degrees, and at night you can see the sky alight with the destruction.  I think it might have something to do with a combination of my Octaver pedal and my Vortex flanger, I'm not sure.  If I can only find the right guitar pedal combination to create a deluge!
  The Flying W Ranch is devestated.  No more steak dinner shows with real gosh-darn cowboys.  Donations are going to The Red Cross right now.  People are fleeing.  I wonder how the critters in the hills are faring?  No one's died yet, but the thick smoke makes dodging elk tricky.
  People stupidly stop to photo it, right IN the danger.  What made everyone photo-journalists these days?  Is it worth your life to stop on I-25 suddenly in dense smoke to photograph death?  It might photograph YOU.  Dorks.  Well, Darwin Awards and all.  Sheesh.
  Schriever and Peterson are still active and we still perform our missions but it's getting hazardous to breathe.  If the wind shifts south, we'll have to evacuate as well.  Luckily, our house is the most south and east possible, so Becky and I will be the last of a few families to go.  Water supply in the Big Johnson Reservoir is almost empty due to the drought.  Should be a wild ride.  I'll keep everyone posted.
  My court-date is still tomorrow for a rolling-stop at a stop-sign (in the middle of nowhere, mind-you).  I tried to pay the ticket but the money-order got sent back due to the wrong department listed.  I had to use the department in the ultra 1-point-font apparently written on the side of the paper.  Very Douglas Adams.
  As for the fire, it doesn't stop justice.  I'll just bring the makings for S'Mores.  Judge Dredd be damned, by hook or by crook!

More here:
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/06/27/us-usa-wildfires-idUSBRE85L1DD20120627

LIVE STREAM HERE!!!
http://www.9news.com/news/article/274327/188/Waldo-Canyon-Fire-prompts-more-evacuations

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Happy Wheels Game

  This game puts DeathRace 2000 to shame.  Here's two previews...



  I think Frankenstein of Death Race 2000 would approve...  Play it here: http://www.happywheelsgame.com/

Wear Your Gear

 


  I've seen quite a few squids out there with no gear on their motorcycles due to the scorching-hot weather.  It's so hot outside, and western Coloardo Springs is on fire.  It's been over 100 degrees for the last few days and the wildfires don't help.
  There was a bike rally on Tejon in C.Springs this weekend but I chose to stay indoors mostly and hide-out from the world playing video games like a good nerd-boy and practicing The Anarchist from Rush's new album (I don't get to use Augmented-D too often in chords).


  I urge every biker to wear their gear, despite the heat.  Besides, a little sweat creates pheromones that the ladies like, and if you must, some mesh-gear breathes just fine.  Go ahead and crack your helmet's visor at stoplights.  Remember, drivers are distracted by all sorts of things and they won't see you as they need to post that last "LOLZ1" on FaceBook with both thumbs!



  I've seen a few guys riding in shorts.  That's just plain stupid, and it looks really really stupid.  Here's an example of going about 10 feet without protection:

 
Not savory.  I'm so anti-ABATE Organization it's silly.  Apparently, Abateofcolo.org wants dead motorcyclists, allowing the choice of a helmet or any gear so they can look cool.  I've had rocks, bees, wasps, other bugs, clothes, and birds fly at my head at triple-digits and let me tell you that helmet sure is handy, especially during a random, freak hailstorm.


  Of course, ABATE suggests that they're for safety, but they're not.  They're more for style and safety gets in the way of that.  You can't look badass on your iron hog with a fa-reak'in helmet on!  Durk a DUR!  Day can't take away our FREE-DURM!  Day DURK a DURRR!


  Quit whinin' about how hot it is and wear your shit, you sissy-boy.




Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Backwards segasseM

 
  After about a day of owning Rush's new album Clockwork Angels, I noticed on the eponymous song there was some very odd Benedictine Monk chanting going on.  I decided to strip it and play it backwards and found a few interesting backwards messages embedded in the song and posted it on YouTube (it takes a while to line-up stuff on YouTube, by-the-way).  I had SCTV's Count Floyd help me with his infamous 3d glasses to stir up the spooky stuff.


   Backwards messages have occurred on albums throughout the ages causing great notoriety.  Kids would play records backwards on their turntables to reveal secret codes or demonic suggestions.  Churches went into hysterics.  An excellent history is found here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Backwards_message.  Around 1983 there was a HUGE legislation against artists using these as subliminal messages to control kids.  Judas Priest, AC/DC, and Twisted Sister were all involved in this, as well as Iron Maiden (who used Jamaican slang, then reversed in Still Life).  A list of backwards messages are found here:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_backmasked_messages


Evil Rush band on evil double-necked evil-tars

  Anyway, here's what I whipped-up off the track.

Maleficent




  Sleeping Beauty (1959) fans, such as myself will be delighted to see Disney releasing an other-side-of-the-coin view of the arch-nemesis, Maleficent portrayed aptly by Angelina Jolie.  I particularly enjoyed the original (as a matter of fact, it's my favorite Disney flick, because the dragon is bad-ass and children were cautioned to see it, and it had a PG rating in the late '70s), though born too-late to see its opening, I saw it in the '70s and was instantly drawn to Don Bluth's first film (he didn't produce it, just animated some portions). 
  The original film has some wonderful parts and the animation was ground-breaking for its time.  Maleficent simply wasn't invited to the party and seeks vengeance.  It'll be interesting how this version plays-out.

  Sorry for the last few posts being just media updates.  It's lame to do that, to be a town crier of sorts.  I promise I'll back off on that and get into some really intense issues than just, "Hey, look what's coming out next!" bull-crap.  I thought this was pretty good though.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Superman vs. Hulk

DC vs. Marvel?  Sometimes there's some crossovers.  A digital company did a surprisingly fine job on it.  I was a bit skeptical but it's pretty good.  Nice tech demo.   Watch part 2 here for a taste, then look up for yourself on Youtube if you're interested.


  And, back to Marvel-only, for the Iron Man 3 film coming up soon, apparently the Green Goblin is an antagonist as The Iron Patriot (Osborn uses this design to inspire Americans that he's actually a hero, not just a Spiderman villian) as well as a cameo of IronMan's arch nemesis of all time, Mandarin.  Very good.



Thursday, June 14, 2012

Down Syndrome Scientists of the Future

  Apparently Ridley Scott of South Shields in the township of Tyne and Wear, England is smoking medicinal marijuana, because he believes that scientists in 2093 invariably all have Down Syndrome.


Prometheus lead scientist

  Prometheus (a sort of Alien prequel) came out last week and I gave it a watch-a-roo.  The movie itself wasn't all that bad if you accept that the film was geared for an 11-year-old tween.  I wasn't going to blog about this but it's been bugging me.
  If you're a xenobiologist, archaeologist, mineralogist, or any kind of ologist, heck even a Joyologist...



..you're not going to start taking your helmet off in an alien environment (due to xeno-viral airborne contaminants that would make you quarantined for all eternity back on Earth), nor would you EVER TOUCH any goo and NOT REPORT ABOUT IT, nor would you feel "really sick" and hide it when you see bugs in your eyeballs. If a snake-like phallus-like creature comes out of black ooze, do you say, "Oh, how cute!" No sir. No, you do not. Not if you're a scientist. Maybe if you're an 11-year-old girl.

We do get to see the "Space Jockey" though. Guess that's okay. Almost makes-up for the horrible characters with IQs of around 90.   Way too many "gay sex" references with oral alien gayness-rape.  There's a huge amount of Scott's Blade Runner opus references as well, for those with ADHD who never watched it and have ADHD-apps for their iPhones.

And what's with girls sleeping at the drop-of-a-hat based on a pathetic, rude suggestion with some sleeze-ball captain in the most inappropriate moment possible? Does Hollywood think this works? Try it, fellas. Be sure to duck when she slaps your face. It stings if you don't. 11-Year-old mentality, here, made for people who like, "Where The Wild Things Are", which was pure drivel. If you got disposable income, go see it, otherwise, wait for it to air on CBS next week.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Queensryche Split

  Geoff Tate, the singer of the band Queensryche has temporarily left the band, though probably permanently, due to conflict of interests and has rekindled his solo career.  In the mean-time, Queensryche has taken-on a new singer, Todd La Torre, previously of the band, Crimson Glory on vocals.  The new band's name is Rising West based on lyrics from their 1983 album, The Warning the awesome cyberpunk song, Before the Storm which is part 7 of the 9-part epic concept album, which, as rockers know by the release of Rush's concept album Clockwork Angels yesterday, is .. flavor of the month.  In fact, if there's a rock band not releasing a concept album this year, it's not worth buying.

  Before The Storm
Red gates of iron cast their Black Shadows on this land, dividing souls far below.
The gathering winds, the armies watch, are rising from the west; foretelling news of Freedom's hand.

In secrecy they've infiltrated all our strongholds, controlling more year after year;
so we've let this happen all along,  believing what's been said. 
Our leaders cry... we have no one to fear

We watch the sun rise, and hope that it won't be our last, before the storm.

Is it late to try; must we all die?  Our system awaits test:
Freedom by choice: is it for all man's, best?
So we wait in fear.  The atom, split.  Our hearts in-two be torn:
Learn from the past, before the storm.

We watch the sunrise, and hope that it won't be our last, before the storm.

  What's more interestinglier is that Rising West is playing only from Queensryche's first 5 albums, aka the good ones and touring right now.  The setlist is here:  Setlist
  The setlist includes excellent selections from Operation Mindcrime as well as other goodies.  One can only hope they'll actually make an album based on the early album themes of sci-fi, cyberpunk, and fantasy-themed awesomeness.  Judging by Todd's pipes, he seems up to the task.  He's actually better than Geoff Tate in the same way Steve Augeri of Journey is now currently a better singer than Steve Perry of his own actual work!
  Here's a bootleg of Rising West in action performing Queen of the Reich at the Hard Rock Cafe in Seattle a few days ago.  Compare Geoff's version last year versus this one versus the original and, well, judge for yourself.


Original version

Polished "Live Evolution DVD" Geoff Tate version 

Todd of Rising West version

  You'll notice Geoff gives up about halfway through, he's just not up to it.  The Energizer Bunny of vocalists Todd keeps on going, and going, and going.  Ace.


  Geoff just keeps giving the band a hard time and the last 5 albums have been all, "Woe is me, I'm a druggie and I can't cope.. blah blah blah".  Yeah, whatever, punk!  Get back onboard with cyber-wizards and "towering fortresses of blackened steel".  Yeah, baby, yeah!






Monday, June 11, 2012

Mayfly Bloggers

 

A message to Mike Cronis by Mike Cronis

I like it that I pretty regularly blog so folks can eat cereal in the mornings, only to spit milk and sugary goodness all over their laptops in anger/shock/approval/disgust/monkey/somethingisabouttohappy.  I get about 100-200 hits a day, which is pretty good on the Klout Score scale for my liking, though a few billion would be preferred, such that I be a Voice that changes nations, but 100 will do nicely, allowing me to conquer a small town and its radio-station so that I can play Van Hagar mercilessly in double-retro-defiance, or better still Van Cherone!


  What bothers me is that I search for other blogs, and aside from the brash Best Page in the Universe blog, which I find a bit cruel at times, there are no other habitual bloggers out there.  No one with the need to orate?  Sadly, FaceBook and Twitter have stolen America's voice down to a few mumbles of comments.  Yay, you had a cupcake today?  That's so important!!!  Good for you!!!  Bless your heart! (pinches face off completely with robot-vice-grip of a retarded monster).  I've read a lot of FaceBook entries; indeed, I was quite dedicated to the site for about a year or so as it seemed to be the new outlet of American commentary.  Sadly, Americans don't have much to say, and FaceBook limits true journalism and comments to a pathetic fragment of characters such that one must haiku any meaning in a strangulated box of despair.  Twitter is doubly guilty, stripping comments they so-5-years-ago call tweets down to 140 characters, which, depending on correct punctuation and grammer-intelligence leads to 25 words or so, give or take, though the pseudo-trendy-tween language of l33t allows probably double that at best, not including meta-tags.
  Both FB and Twitter yield trite comments with even trite-ier responses.  "Smartphone" wielders can suckle the trickle of personalities barely from these offerings, leaving much to suppose.  Only the brilliant can make anything of value from such limited space, and believe me, almost none qualify for "brilliant" I've noticed on FaceBook or Twitter.  So low, in fact, it might as well be zero as it approaches zero nearly completely, Lord forbid anyone divide by it on an '80s computer, it'd crash utterly.


  Twitter makes people seem dumb and boring with such limited tweets and FB seems empty and trite as I don't care that you think Transformers 3 was, "...the best movie ever.  Period." without justifying it on a thousand levels because your announcing it like a 12-year-old doesn't quite convince me or the other 2000 so-called "friends" you have.  Without basis I cannot digest that as "fact": it comes up as "vomit".  I have to confess, however, that I suspect some people only go to a movie once or twice a year so that when they do they're so emotionally overwhelmed they love it no matter what.  I think it's what JJ Abrams banks-on, "Hey, it's got explosions in it!  You like that, right?"  Ahem, sir.

Okay, but it needs more lens-flare on top of the lens-flare...

  So I've ran retrograde to the "Blog".  I enjoy the environment and it's happily narcissistic, more-so than FB for the eloquent typist and a great opportunity to orate, create, journalize, and vent despite its archaic shortcomings.  At least a few hundred agree with me, and you readers I salute.
  To my sadness, however, there are so few blogs out there that are consistent.  I find a few start-out every other-day and then cease.  Some last for a few months, about one per week, then suddenly stop, then start up again a few years later for one or two more entries then are dead.  I find that pathetic.  Heck, just delete your blog entirely than leave your one paragraph about starting to work-out and go on a diet without a full 3 or 4 year commentary!  How am I supposed to value what you have to say?  By my standards I suspect you've failed utterly and gave-up like some 1970's movie ending or anything Asian, realizing to improve is futile an accept what "is" without that spirit of American "fight".  Sad.


  As a matter of fact, I cannot find any consistent blog I'm interested in.  There's a lot of housewives with nothing to do and they blog about chocolate and baby and chocolate baby and dishes and baby and emptiness.  It reflects on their repetitive acceptance of life, such that they know all life is now for them is to bring-up baby, clean, cook, baby, baby, and finally die, gleaning any kind of happiness off of those things, likely medicating along the way for depression at age 45, getting a divorce, and marrying a bruiser as they look back at their wreck of a life with despair.  Not interested in child-rearing unless it involves Aldous Huxley techniques of sirens and zero gravity.  It's not wrong, it's just.. boring to me.  Again, I'm not against kids by any means, but it's probably not something a lot of folks want to read about.  Regardless, these bloggers die-off like mayflies within a few months anyway.
  I want a GOOD BLOGGER!  Someone with some SOUL.  Someone with some PASSION for LIFE!  I like to read those things, and someone who blogs often.  I'm a fan of that, even if I don't agree, even if it's about "baby".  Fine.  Blog away!  Just keep doing it.  Something for me to spit my milky Coco Puffs at while I disagree and comment, "Baby sounds retarded, have you tried a brick?"

She did... and she's been deemed not-guilty...
Will the real killer ever be found?


Yeah, man.. God bless America!
Someday we'll find those killers!!!  Hm....

Just sayin'..

Take this opportunity to clean your laptop screen...

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Here There Be Clowns

 
Went to Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey circus yesterday for a scorching afternoon show (outside temp topped nearly 100 degrees) at the Colorado World Arena here in Colorado Springs just a few miles from our home.  I had never been to a circus and there's a lot of interesting expectations for one as old as myself.  I didn't know to expect Something Wicked This Way Comes (1983) or Stephen King's It (1990) or something probably more like Doris Day and Jimmy Durante in "Billy Rose's Jumbo" (1962) or probably a combination of the three.  All three trailers below.


Something Wicked This Way Comes

It

Billy Rose's Jumbo

  Interestingly, it was none of these things.  The show was pretty insane.  None were the side-show freaks that I'd expect, or on-the-dirt country-fair style workings complete with merry-go-round and the magic of Ferris' Wheel;  instead there apparently was a pre-show outdoors in the parking lot where you could see some of the animals but from what I've read, no games-of-chance or trial-by-combat Thunderdomes or whatever, but at 100 degrees we missed that, and I believe it was cut short and it was very small due to parking restrictions. 
  Inside the World Area (for those who've been) it's a thin, rounded corridor against a modest concert hall.  Lining the corridor walls were vendors of almost all exactly the same things:  cotton-candy, snow-cones, popcorn, and Chinese plastic flashing toys that have lots of blinking LEDs.  Everything was, of course, violently overpriced.  Cotton-candy was $12, but you get a magic fabric top-hat with it, so I guess it was worth it, so I got that, because, hey, magic hat.  The blinky-toys were $15 to $35 and the only magic they held was that your wallet got lighter as they lit-up.  Snow-cones were $20 and rather small, but you get to keep the plastic clown cup and straight basic straw.  I think popcorn was infinity dollars.  Don'tchya WANT it?  Yep, no balloons.  Aww...

Sellers during the intermission sold flashing madness.

  So we sat in our medium-level seat which was quite fine.  The spectacle included a lot of happenings, to include an actual 3-ring-at-once show.  Music was live which was very impressive, to include pyrotechnics.  Started-out bringing just about everyone out into the floor at-once with an opening song by the Master of Ceremonies who was as if Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was performed by Michael Duncan.


The MC chatting-up one of the bedazzled girls.


Star Spangled Banner in Wonder Woman garb.

  Things settled-down pretty quickly and everyone fell instantly in-love with "Paco" the midget side-kick of the MC.  The entire show seemed to be based about harnessing the "Power of the Dragon" by mastering the four virtues of, "Courage, Strength, Wisdom, and Heart".  Why the MC and all the clowns there want to harness the "Power of the Dragon" is unclear.  They seem pretty intent on getting that though, and it worries me a little.   

Beware the Clowns

  The set is broken-up into two parts with a 30 minute intermission in-between.  Each set was 1 hour.  During the pre-show inside, elephants painted and kids could play with clowns (some kids may not have made it back to this dimension, it's unclear).

Elephants paint pre-show.

Horse-masters galloped around the ring doing stunts of which someone almost got killed.  Dual motorcyclists rode up tight-wires with acrobat girls on-board.  At one point, the bike flipped.

Honda Rebel motorcycles can go anywhere.

  I was pretty stressed-out with the lion-tiger show.  Those cats did NOT care for their trainer and would all often synchronize to attack as they all stepped closer to him all-at-once with death in their eyes as he momentarily moved his gaze behind him.  VERY treacherous indeed as he could have been ripped to shreds easily.  I wonder what the tons of little kids thought of that.  With older eyes I could see that the cats definitely wanted him dead; no joke.  I missed the shot where they all charged at him at-once in two steps because my heart stopped.  I think the dumb parents/kids thought the pretty kitties were nice.

Cats obeying.. for now..


Death to.. MING!

  Shao-Lin monks performed an interesting take on the "strong man" theme, smashing sticks against their backs, stabbing and bending spears with their necks and bending steel bars around their throats.  (Shao-Lin?) Clowns later lampooned it, probably because clowns have superpowers and are indestructible gods.

Shao-Lin


Shao-Clowns

Shao-shao

  Intermission and then trapeze next.  Girl performed the triple somersault which had never been performed by a female artist before.  She failed it the first time, but we all were routing for her as she just got back up and gave it the old American try again, and succeeded.  This shot is her more determined preparation and you can see the determination.

She'll get it, this time! (and does!)

  In between each mini-show, there's a gala of several people running around, the MC and Paco singing and galavanting, and the band plays wildly with great electric guitar work.  Very rock-oriented, with no sign of Enter the Gladiators calliope to be found to my shock.!!!?


Rockin' like it's 1997

  The show ended with elephants as expected, and more gala events, singing, and the dragon shows up.  Luckily it's Thule the gold dragon (I'd be afraid if it was polychromatic) and he breathes golden fire (interesting, that).  The dragon goes around the arena.


Got elephants?

  Eight motorcyclists go through a traditional sphere-cage and don't die, amazingly.


Recorded by me using my Canon Powershot HD
(love the MC at the end)
Paco masters every challenge though, and so great, now we have a midget with Dragon Powers.  Good God, man!
  Overall I had a very good time.  Becky's Facebook page has some more pics, including me in a magic hat.  The whole thing was more of a gala event than what I'd assume a circus might be with lots of mini-tents and sideshow characters, but it was very fun and worthwhile and cost about $35 which was fair enough!  Music was top-notch and stunts were very choreographed and well-done, and I must admit, it may very well be the greatest show on Earth.

Saturday, June 9, 2012

China to Launch Manned Spacecraft


BEIJING — China will launch three astronauts this month to dock with an orbiting experimental module, and the crew might include its first female space traveler, a government news agency said Saturday.
A rocket carrying the Shenzhou 9 spacecraft was moved to a launch pad in China's desert northwest on Saturday for the mid-June flight, the Xinhua News Agency said, citing an space program spokesman.
The three-member crew will dock with and live in the Tiangong 1 orbital module launched last year, Xinhua said. The government has not said how long the mission will last.
Xinhua cited Niu Hongguang, deputy commander in chief of the manned space program, as saying the crew "might include female astronauts."
The government said in 2010 that two female air force pilots had joined the astronaut program but has disclosed no other details.


CRONIS' TRANSLATION --- China will execute three barely-qualified doomed prisoners this month in an elaborate and costly incineration using the Shenzhou 9 POS bottle-rocket aka "Divine Craft" aka "Chingy-chingy CHOW!" aka "Bottle Rocket of Moderate Death and Sadness".  The three prisoners might include a female perpetrator, a government news agency (aka Mindcrime Evil Control Fart) said Saturday.
A rocket carrying the "Chingy-Chingy CHOW!" was moved to a launch pad in China's desert (aka, not the mountainy-part or the violently overcrowded and polluted watery part) for the mid-June execution, the Xinhua News Agency said, citing a space-program spokesman (aka prisoner/scientist).
The three-prisoner crew will explode at 1000 feet and die into a pesky village blocking a future dam which will power more Chickity China Chinese Chicken restaurants, stating, "Have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'."
The government said in 2010 that two female prostitutes have joined the astronaut program and have minimal STDs but disclosed no other details.



Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Your Kids Make You Retarded

  Firstly, the new Rush album Clockwork Angels is due out next week, and it's been leaked onto YouTube.  There's no concern though, I of course will buy it so I won't affect sales.  It's very progressive like the way they used to be in the mid-'70s in the same way Emerson, Lake and Palmer's triumphant 1972 release of Tarkus is progressive (which interestingly ranked #9 in the Billboard Top 200 and #1 in the UK at the time, yeah, your parents were probably "banging" to this, because A Passion Play was #3 the next summer by Jethro Tull.. this was what was on the radio at the time!  Frack Lady Gaga!  To hell with Linkin' Park!  THIS was what it was all about, and Elvis can choke on his own b'cawk.)
  Update*  The link was just taken down after only being up for 2 hours.  Still, you can hear the song Carnies on my hidden website page here:  MikeCronis.com Hidden Page.



  So there I am at work, minding my own business when someone started talking about kids.  It's a common subject I'm bored to death about.  I mentioned that people stop learning when they have kids.  They stop growing as people.  I was countered with the argument that no, this is not the case, and in fact you start growing as a person.  I insisted on an example, because most people I know who have kids were so burned-out and glazed-over in their eyes and all their hobbies stopped and life became all about their kids.  He explained that you watch how they grow cognitively and then you learn about yourself that way.  I was unimpressed. 


  I watched a lot of Sesame Street and other child-developmental shows when I was young, and then again when I was in my early 20s to understand child development.  So fascinated I was about it that I spent many years afterwards watching the hidden subtext of cognitive learning and techniques by use of color selection, sound selection and childrens' responses.  It was very intriguing on all media levels.  I explained this and insisted on an example that I might have missed since he said actually having kids makes it more poignant.
  He gave an anecdote of how his kid had a Buzz Lightyear (of the Pixar film Toy Story) doll and after several months got on top of the couch and jumped off it, holding the doll high.  His eyes gleamed in delight.  The other child-owner in the discussion also was delighted by this, "See how you learn by this?"




  Babies are stupid and learn by trial-and-error usually.  No duh.

  I was disgusted.  That was not a very good example.  Indeed, it seems rather retarded, but it was obvious the child assumed he could possibly fly if he held Buzz up high and jumped, or perhaps he was using imagination to show flight for the toy.  Either way.  No big deal.  Rather dull.  Who hasn't done something like that?  I admitted to him it was pretty uninteresting.
  He argued that when you're a teacher, you learn more from your students than not.  I've always found this not the case and said so, because I research the HELL out of something before I teach it.  Rarely did I ever have to dig something up beforehand to the students.  I prepared for it early-on and did my job properly.  He then countered I was not a very good teacher then, though I neglected to tell him all of my students scored a grade of "A" in my entire career in the USAF because of my good teaching of whom some were real stumps.  So proud I am of that fact that it's on my resume.  I, my friends, am an expert teacher.
   I'm still pissed-off about his slight though.  I doubt I'll ever forgive him for it.  He also said several months earlier that I don't love cars by way of argument that I have no shitty ones which might be cool in aesthetic purposes; however I must confess I take such good care of my vehicles that I go as far as change the oil twice as often as I should and when detailing with Q-Tips actually wax the underside of my hood and the engine components.  I've used bottled water to rinse off my car in North Dakota because the water was too hard with minerals.  He, on the other hand hasn't washed his beat-up shit-cars in months and takes his vehicles in annually to trust the dealership to do their maintenance.  One car is missing a dashboard for the last year and has mismatched seats from another car in it.  None of the cars have ever seen wax.  I love my vehicles so much I don't trust dealerships to do any work on them and if I'm stuck having to go to a dealership I insist on waiting in the garage and watch them work on it, verifying torque settings on the wrenches and what-not.  I'm sure I'm a PITA for them but.. ah yes, I don't love cars.



  You see, people have kids and the majority (yeah, not all) give up a lot of their life to live for their kids.  A glaze goes over their eyes of happiness and they forget that they don't have a life any more.  They're just in joy of the kid.  Fine fine, but it's a bit sad.  The kid is almost always unimpressed with this and will rebel in their teens regardless and be ungrateful.  Guaranteed.  Inevitable to some degree.  It's the Way of Life.  In my opinion, the parents act retarded over this.  They love it.  They love thinking they're learning something when, no, you're not, unless you are super-dumb and had no passion for investigation.  The Internet was the best thing that ever happened to me for that hobby, gleaning all sorts of goodies making my thirst for trivia satiated.  I enjoy learning new things on my own.  It's fun.  When a parent thinks their kid is the shit, they usually are wrong.  No one gives a shit about your kid except you.  Even your kid doesn't give a shit that you care that much.  They don't require or want that much attention.  Some is good, sure, but doting, gushing?  Nope.  I found that about girlfriends too.  38 Special helped with the song Hold on Loosely.  Good wisdom there.  Parents get so involved with the kid's doing things that they become brain-dead about it with glee.  By 16 the kid has moved-on mentally while the parent's brain has regressed into mush and can't go back to normal.  The parent loves the kid so much that in a few years of birth, the stay-at-home parent becomes a mental-case and is happy to watch pre-kindergarten TV all day and talk baby-talk all day long until, well, they become to the same mental level as the kid a bit.  When they snap out of it, that rubber-band of sanity doesn't have the same tensity, and you never make it back all the way day after day until.  Zombie-time, and your kids resent it, and you're done.



  It's not the kids that make you complete.  It's your passion for life, and admiring them dosen't improve you except for your capacity for compassion.  The secret lies elsewhere.  Find it.

  So if you have to have kids, keep your wits about you, or try to.  The Earth doesn't need any more humans, and you're not doing anyone a favor by having them, but it's fine if you have kids.  Try not to have too many, because no, you're not that important.  If your IQ is over 140 or you're a super-athlete which later can become a slave working-class creature then fine.  Screw away.

Friday, June 1, 2012

I am Bryan Adams

  The legal battle against YouTube is still on-going as they're still convinced that the guitar and bass work (as well as keyboards) was none other than Bryan Adams and not myself on the cover song Run To You off the album, "Reckless", however it is going up against their lawyers right now.  I find it unusual because to me it's obvious I'm not using a single-coil Fender Stratocaster for the tune or a Fender Jazz bass guitar and the keyboards I added to enhance the bass overture is not something Bryan did.  It can be seen at my Music Video section of www.mikecronis.com if you're interested.  Interestingly, a girl at work was embarrassed by my poor rendition of it, nor did she "get" the video which has to do with the "other woman" spoken-of in the song as his "guitar" and not a cheating mistress.  If you watch the "Official" Bryan Adams channel on YouTube, it's apparent as he speaks of, "..if she ever found out about you and I", he points to a Fender Strat sticking out of the snow on the set.  In other scenes in the video, the only other girl there is his "guitar" that he "runs to". 
"Self-expression doesn't seem to be one of your problems..."



Sunrise from my back porch (facing, well, east of course..)

  Colorado Springs has a few interesting touristy locations, and I hadn't been to a good portion of them in nearly 2 decades (yes, I'm that old), one of which is called Seven Falls.  Though some would think it a boring location, (most Americans would and do, as it's mostly out-of-country tourists now, because there's limited lens-flare and Americans are too busy thumbing their dumb-phones to notice God)  it's actually not that bad.  En-route we stopped at my favorite bar, The Hatchcover, which is delightfully non-pretentious and has great wings and a fantastic selection of beers, ciders, and whiskies (and whiskeys) catering to American and Canadian cuisine under the shadow of Cheyenne Mountain where I used to work from 1999 to 2002.  Delicious. 
  We get to Seven Falls and a small elevator can take you to a vantage point to look at each of the seven cascading waterfalls (some rather short being only a few feet) all interconnected.  To actually climb the falls is another matter as it's about 30 stories to get to the top via stairs with one rest halfway up.

Tunnel leading to elevator



View at top of elevator (click picture for closeup)
(notice the stairs)



  Surprisingly, Becky was up to it despite her broken foot in 36 places never mending and her toes locked permanently in place due to a rather harsh motorcycle crash from an out-of-control car a few years back. 



  We purposely brought "critter snax" with us to feed the chipmunks as I remembered a plethora of them about 19 years ago (they're still there, the great great great grandkids of the ones I met in 1993).  Cute "cupcake shapes" and some nut-cluster-goodies specifically made for rabbits and chipmunks from WalMart for a few dollars to feed the scurrying species of chipmunk (no Snooki breeds as they're all at the bar in preparation for her "Snooklings" brood-birth) were handed out to chipmunk glee.


GooGoo Chipmunk cluster

Whatcya' got?

    We were interrupted with this snack-fest when incredibly unintelligent folks with their "DE-STROY" kids would come smashing through into our space to "pet" the chipmunks as they screamed, throwing rocks.  This is great birth-control btw.  If I ever did that, I'd get swacked, and no, you won't go to jail for that, you're just lazy parents and pathetic.  Do it and you'll get a Hero's Medal (for doing your job).  Jesus would high-five you, and everyone would pitch-in and do a collection and give the parent $100 each.  This is what happens if you don't, they grow up like this: CLICK  Parents are so drained they don't even stop them, and are too unintelligent to realize that to approach an animal you have to be very slow and quiet and be patient and wait for sometimes up to a half hour, but this "generation" doesn't get that.  We did, and got the animals to climb up on the seat with us and take food from our hands.  Baby Destroy Voltron Monster did not get so lucky, nor the clones of the wasted remains of the iPhone Generation.  I suspect their demon-spawn will have very strong thumbs as they're worked hard, glued to their low-qual touch-sensitive LCD screens, probably while high and drunk.  No one likes your kids, girl, they just want to get in your pants and then leave you.  They're lying.  Did you know 1 in 3 kids now have autism.  I blame Apple's 800Mhz at 1.6 watt of brain-damaging goodness.  My 4G makes me feel itchy.  Yep.  Drain Bramage.



 The rather challenging 300 steps to the top rewarded for an excellent view of not the falls as, well, we're on top of them now, though it was amazing and I was able to shun my fear of heights because I was too busy rooting Becky on for great success. 


(Note* 200 foot drop to the right of this picture.. 100 feet to go).


At the top of Seven Falls, a 300 foot drop behind me btw.  Becky made it!

Seven Falls local fauna.


Something important is happening, but I can't see it because of lens flare!!!


After this, only 200 more stairs down and we're back!


Down we go!

  She normally has a hard time descending stairs more than ascending but managed it in no time and we escaped a near-downpour as we greeted a nice Kiwi New Zealander and then avoided the "I have a kid so it's okay if they frack-up every possible nature environment peaceful time because I don't get to have peace so why should anyone else oh I'm so drained but kids are the best thing that ever happened to me though I have a New Life Church glazed-over lie in my eyes".


At the bottom.

  We went home, took a nap, and woke up to watch the 1933 film Night Flight staring John Barrymore and Clark Gable on our theater screen.  Good film, never seen it. Most Americans wouldn't have the patients for it.  Not enough lens-flare or false science.  As I quote one soul-less chap I work with, "I don't go to watch movies to think.  I go to be entertained."  To which I quipped, "I go to movies to think, which makes me entertained."


                               


   Took in a little Hulu Plus pop-culture and watched Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares in New Jersey (season 3, ep.1) as our thigh muscles complained from the climb and she made it to midnight, her face buried in Siamese cat (it's what Siamese do, hence the concern for the baby's survival in Lady and the Tramp, for they like to sleep sideways on faces to keep warm, though Becky's used to critters doing that as she lived on a farm and her dogs and cats would all pig-pile anyway).  Working a mid tomorrow she urged me to stay up so as to be alert for tomorrow, and hence, this blog.  There are those that fall asleep at work, and to those, I find them traitors to America and are weak and pathetic.  We work on a USAF Operations base!  We must stay vigil, America counts on us to!  To those who don't care, I spit at them.  P'tewie! 

  Overall, a great day.  Now to play King's Bounty Crossworlds.  Tricky game.  Huzzah!